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ISSUE #137

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Don't panic! This month, we present an abridged guide to your rights as a Malaysian citizen. Are makeshift gated communities legal? Do you have any rights in a street demonstration? Well, go find out!

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Wednesday's Word Up: Action Porn

Wednesday, 19/08/09 - 14:42PM Filed in Blog by jit | Views: 1684 | Comments: 1
Tags: Klue, kl, kuala lumpur, malaysia, word up, colloquial

Once in a while in the English language there are things that just escapes it's grasp, mainly because society evolves whereas languages barely change.

Today's word is: Action Porn.

It's used to describe a movie or a clip that basically puts together a series of fight scenes that makes no sense at all. Everything from the plot, character development, emotional peaks to twists are done through action scenes. The only reason action porn exists is to put "awesome" on screen. The plot of an Action porn is written like so:

  1. Receive script from producers
  2. Cross out scene changes with blood from the antagonist of previous action porn
  3. Maintain a fairly consistant plot
  4. Add some sort of martial art (fire, rockets, dinosaurs optional)
  5. If not, use cars or anything that is awesome
  6. People die
  7. The End

Deaths are required to be superbly awesome. They may include weapons, fire, large animals, a truly rockin' soundtrack, and explosions (or all of the above). This means when a character dies, the last 3 of his twitter posts get wiped off from the face of cyberspace. Seriously.

Notable action porn are: Ong Bak, Ong Bak 2, Death Race, Crank, and Crank 2.

Please leave more titles in the comments for other readers referencing.


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1 COMMENT

Rambo IV?

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Posted by Ollie on 21 August

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